Let me tell you something about...

Let me tell you something about lunchtimes at PBS. When the bell goes our teacher sends us out and we all race out the door like bees coming out of a hive. After we gobble our lunches we race down the stairs. Once we’re at the bottom of the stairs all we can see is children of all sizes and ages racing around like aliens with big eyes. I don’t even think they know why they’re racing around! It’s like a race when we run over to the court to play handball. Everyone runs because everyone wants the best spot in the game. I always try to get the King spot because that means you start the game, and I like starting the game. We do this until the bell rings telling us all that lunchtime is over. If you stand back and look you will see that most people walk slowly back up the stairs, which is quite different from the start of lunchtime.

Today my Writing group and I wrote a four minute story about lunchtime at PBS. After I finished my story I had to proofread it then work with our partners to read each other's story. After that we added things to fix sentences that didn’t make sense. What I thought I did well was remembering to put in full stops and I tried to hook in the reader.